BBM VLOG 277: Valentine’s Day

Magandang araw po sa inyong lahat at Maligayang Araw ng mga Puso!

Sigurado ako punong-puno ang mga mall at restaurant dahil sa maraming nagda-date. Masaya rin ang mga nagbebenta ng bulaklak at iba pang mga pang regalo.

At kahit medyo may kabigatan ang traffic, sigurado naman akong sulit na sulit naman ito.

Sana ay nasa magandang mood tayong lahat dahil ang pagmamahal ang nangingibabaw sa araw na ito.

May ilan tayong mga katanungan galing sa ating mga kaibigang kabataan, mga youth group na aktibong tumutulong sa atin.

Masisipag itong mga batang ito at talagang isinasabuhay ang mga adbokasiyang isinusulong nila kahit bata pa lang.

Having been married for more than 30 years, what advice would you give to couples who want a long and healthy relationship?

Palagay ko alam na ito nang matagal ng mag-asawa, ang sikreto lang diyan—hindi naman talaga sikreto—ay dapat bigayan. Hindi naman pare-pareho ang lahat ng tao.

Dapat nagbibigayan lang at nagkakaunawaan ang mag-asawa. Hindi puwede ‘yung “my way or no way.” Pagka ganoon, hindi, may isang laging malungkot doon. Kaya bigayan lang.

Without ruining the surprise, what are your plans for the upcoming Valentine’s Day?

Kami siguro, mababaw lang ang kaligayahan namin. Makalibre lang kami ng isang evening na kung ano ang gagawin, it doesn’t really matter basta may kaunting free time na hindi namin iniisip ang trabaho, just to be with one another.

Kung may isang love song na naglalarawan sa love story ninyo ni First Lady Liza, ano ‘yun?

Well, hindi ko alam kung mayroong kanta na naglalarawan pero ‘yung love song talaga namin ay dahil ito ‘yung nung siguro one of our dates, first dates nung nasa New York pa kami is “Moonlight in Vermont” na kinanta ni Sarah Vaughan.

Sa kabila ng inyong busy schedule, paano niyo binabalanse ang trabaho at oras para sa pamilya at sa isa’t isa?

Isa na ito sa pinakamahirap na gawin dahil halos lahat ng pamilya ko, we are all very, very busy. I’m very busy. The First Lady is very busy. ‘Yung mga anak ko are also very busy.

Kung minsan mahirap makabuo ng kahit na sandali, kahit Linggo may ginagawa, isang araw lang o mag-dinner man lang basta’t mayroon kaming opportunity na magsama, we take it.

Hindi namin maplano talaga kung minsan. Kung minsan biglaan na lang. “Uy, it turns out libre tayong lahat. O sige, sige magkita tayo. We’ll do something together.” ‘Yun lang.

One of the best ways that pagka halimbawa may long weekend, we just go somewhere punta kami sa Ilocos, punta kami sa isang lugar. Pero kami lang basta’t magkasama kaming lima kahit sino pa may girlfriend, walang ano, kami lang, it doesn’t matter basta’t we find time to be with each other. It’s not so easy but we do our best.

If you were to cook for FL this Valentine’s Day what dish would you prepare?

I wouldn’t cook. It would be oysters and champagne. Because nung we started going out, ito ang aming laging ginagawa dahil siyempre pareho kami mahilig kami – mahilig kami sa talaba at kasama ng talaba para medyo kaunting romantic eh ang champagne.

Noong medyo mahirap ang buhay, basta makakain lang kami ng kaunting oysters at saka makainom kami ng kaunting champagne, medyo okay pa kami.

There’s a trend today using the — I know this song… There’s a trend today using the Taylor Swift song “Ruin the Friendship” where young people share how they risked a friendship by confessing their feelings. Did you ever have a “ruin the friendship” moment with each other? Would you advise the youth to do the same?

I don’t think that ruin the friendship. I understand what Taylor Swift is trying to say, that you move away from the friend zone and you become boyfriend, girlfriend, jowa, whatever you want to call it.

But for me, the basis of any good relationship is true friendship. The best relationships I’ve seen have all been started by being friends. ‘Yung sinasabi nga, nade-develop ‘yan.

Pero kung hindi kayo magkaibigan, you don’t have fun with each other. You don’t enjoy each other’s company and you don’t amuse each other. You don’t ‘yung kagaya ‘yung linya sa sine, “you complete me.” If that doesn’t happen, mahirap talagang magkaroon ng pagsasama. So, I think it should be based on a real and true friendship.

Ano po para sa inyo ang ideal daughter-in-law? Bakit may nag-a-apply?

Para sa akin, simpleng-simple lang: ‘yung isang nagmamahal na tunay sa aking anak. Basta’t mahal na mahal ‘yung anak ko dahil iniisip lagi ang kanyang kalagayan at lagi siyang nakabantay para sa ikabubuti ng anak ko, that’s a daughter-in-law for me is a good one.

Do you still believe in the concept of “ligaw”?

Yes. Kasi nung single pa ako nanliligaw talaga kami. ‘Yun ang ano sa ‘yung ano sa amin. Siyempre iba-ibang klaseng ligaw ganoon pa rin ‘yung mga traditional dati –‘yung pinupuntahan mo sa bahay, magkukwentuhan.

Tapos magdadala kayo — magdadala ng regalo. Once in a while magde-date, manood ng sine, mag-dinner, whatever.

So ‘yung concept na ‘yun talagang buhay na buhay ‘yung sa experience ng generation ko. Pero ‘yung mga anak ko, tinatanong ko, “Nagda-date pa ba kayo?” Parang hindi na eh. Iba na ‘yung concept na pagpapakilala sa isa, paano magiging malapit.

Dati wala pa kami ‘yung mga dating app na ginagamit ngayon. But now it’s different. Now it’s a commonplace. And I suppose the whole concept of ligaw… I’m sure imposibleng hindi – na mawawala ‘yung nanliligaw. ‘Yung gusto mong maging malapit sa isang tao dahil gusto mo siya. But the way that it’s done, mukhang nagbago na.

How do you show that you care for each other without even saying it?

I suppose the most obvious way or the least – well how do you say? The most subtle way is that the other always feels na lagi mo silang iniisip, that you’re always thinking about them, and that you’re worried about their – that they’re okay. Make sure that they’re all right. And you do all these little things just to make their lives a little easier. That’s — that I think is the best way that you can show your love.

Do you have any advice for the youth this Valentine’s Day?

Well, enjoy yourselves. Enjoy each other’s company. You know, it is rare to find someone.

Like I say, kahit na hindi mo magiging asawa pero somebody that you care for and he cares for you, who you have a very nice time together.

‘Yun na nga bumalik tayo doon sa konsepto ng friendship.

That’s what you should try to find. And once you have found it and it’s Valentine’s Day, enjoy it to the fullest. It is a lovely feeling.

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